Tuesday, April 08, 2008

issue of trust

I was checking my emails n stuff when I came across a thing my friend said about me. Well, not that I care too much about it but I realized the truth in it. He said, "Knowing your character, you dun trust people easily."

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HOW TRUE!!

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All along since I was young (sounding as if I'm 50 o sumthing), I was a very very confident person n just plain happy, although there were down times (life's not perfect, u see). Was doing great in almost everything; studies, love, family, friendship etc. Then, few years back, something unexpected happened… I was suddenly put in a spotlight n was thrust into a massive row with some people I perceived as good friends. It was indeed a pivotal point in my life. It immediately changed me tremendously and shook my belief system. Someone I thought was my good friend told some backstabbing lies n somehow I was the one to walk off with the bill and I was instantly made d bad person out of the whole thing. Weird. It still feels that way after years. But anyhow, since that incident, I was constantly doubting my choices in life, wasn't feeling very good bout myself, and sad. And most importantly, I lost total trust in friends! Bcoz even other friends whom I thought would b on my side, looked away and stayed with the majority out of conformity, I supposed. Well, I do get them coz it’s always an easier choice to conform than to face the many. Nothing really lifted my spirits back up. From there on, my studies went down the drain due to the lack of focus n I jz couldn’t b stuffed with anything. Subsequently, I did what’s best for me:


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Left the whole situation n changed my environment completely!!

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It worked so well. My studies went back on track, met new people, made new friends, never felt fresher! (thou I’m nv as confident anymore) Then, I went to Perth and life’s nv been greater!! I met my hubby and my life’s so complete now. I’m feeling so content and come to think of it, I needed that painful experience for I wouldn’t have grown so much emotionally n personally, wouldn’t know who my true friends are, would still b stuck with those ‘multiple-masked-ppl’, would never knew how blindly I trusted ppl.

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I really am very thankful for the support of my parents, Ant n my very very trustworthy new mateys; Kevin, Jill, Weisim, Evelyn, Sharon. Love u guys!!

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P.S.: U guys betta dun let me down…being so important to me (coz my secret's with y'all), I’ll kill u ;-P

2 comments:

endless-scroll said...

hehe... i TRY to keep it k.. no worries ;p

Happy Eve said...

Finally!!! you mention my name here...Haha!